Conflict Management

Conflict Management and Critical Life Skills  

Things that are not taught at school.

Don’t you agree that a strong educational system must include teaching some crucial life skills?

The type of life skills an individual will carry beyond the school years. Skills that are a must in order to navigate the turbulent waters that we all go through life, being able to thrive both personally and business.

I have become a student of this fascinating subject.

Of course, there are many skills that are considered game changers in order to enjoy a more fulfilling life with success and significance.

Those skills that precisely are not taught at school, but are so much needed in crucial times that define our happiness and meaning.

Today I will talk about one of those life skills…

Conflict Management

You may agree that life is full of conflict.

Wherever there are people, there is conflict.

At home, in the neighborhood, at work, in politics and even at church.

It is literally impossible to avoid conflicts.

Each conflict I’ve experienced in life has left some bitter memories, but also, great lessons and wisdom.

Sucess is not a function of not having conflict, but yet, it is a matter of dealing with it and getting the most out of each situation.

One of the biggest challenges in conflict resolution is dealing with the conventional belief that in order for me to win, someone needs to lose.

Or, the belief that conflict management is a matter of deciding who is right, and who is wrong.

Many companies suffer from escalating conflict levels because they hire people for what they know, and end up getting rid of them for who they are.

Not knowing how to deal with conflict could mean frustration and failure in relationships, in business and family.

Conflicts are part of life. It is a matter of developing life skills to best equip you with techniques while gaining new perspectives when confronting life’s many conflicts.

Getting rid of our own filters and judgments is crucial for better conflict management and resolutions.

Otherwise, we go into conflicts with our own agenda and belief system, unconsciously thinking that we are right and others are wrong.

One of the key factors for successful conflict management is approaching with a mindset of asking the right questions, active listening and documenting the facts.

I keep being a student, learning, practicing and mastering my conflict management skills. One of the most important like skills.

Here are some of the self- questions that have helped me the most while dealing with other’s different opinions and points of view:

How can I help? 

What is she/he really trying to say? 

Why she/he is behaving that way?

The type of thinking from someone who knows how to deal with conflict is one that leads to the best alternatives practicing proven techniques to effectively build empathy with others.

Effective conflict management individuals don’t blame others are not trying to be right, neither being the winners in front of losers They are looking for win-win resolutions.


5 quick tips for Conflict Management

  1. When facing a conflict, listen carefully and pay attention to the emotions, body language and points of view from others.
  2. Practice your communications skills.
  3. Make eye contact. Visual contact communicates transparency and builds trust.
  4. Apologize for any misunderstanding and say the ‘magic’ words: ” I need your help. I know you can help me with this.”
  5. Share your win-win proposal with calmness. Again, keep paying attention to body language from others.


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Jose Luis